The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA) commercials are awful. The excruciatingly long footage of depressed, shaking, and dirty dogs and cats is a lame argument. It makes something that is unfortunate feel laughable and out of touch. I always say to myself, “If they can afford a commercial this long, they can probably do just fine without my money.” To preface, I love pets; I just like criticizing commercials.
All of the argumentative strategies I have learned and sprinkled into my blog entries have been building up to this critique, and what took the cake was chapter 5 of The Weight of Shadows by José Orduña and a blog entry titled “Writing Dramatic Scenes” by Dave Hood. The two pieces highlight the main flaw of the ASPCA commercials – dramatic scenes.
Effective Dramatic Scenes
The author of The Weight of Shadows illustrates a scene with a young couple and their immigration lawyer. Although the author can not make out all the words the couple and the immigration lawyer are saying, he fills in the details in an extremely specific fashion. For example, on page 84 they illustrate the immigration lawyer: “His pale face would have turned bright red as he informed them that the state might ask questions about their partner’s intimate clothing: what color, what cut, what size,” (Hood). Not only does the author conjure a vivid scene, but they also provide input on what's happening. The author points out the absurdity of the immigration system, arguing the immigration system has a flawed definition of a couple and notoriously idiotic and difficult interview questions. The Weight of Shadows employed dramatic scene techniques that are suggested by Hood, such as stating the location (a waiting room), using sensory details, and using dialogue.
Advice
Even though there wasn't a big donate button at the of chapter 5 in The Weight of Shadows, the story compels me to advocate for change within the immigration system in America more than the ASPCA commercial compels me to donate toward pets without a home. For ASPCA to construct more compelling dramatic scenes, here are some suggestions:
Add more dialogue. A not-so-subtle “donate now,” at the end is nice and all, but adding more dialogue from people who specialize in giving pets a home would be more compelling and an epic ethos move.
Target a specific location ie. homeless puppies in Chicago. This can make donors more comfortable contributing on a month-to-month basis because this will give them decent evidence that their money is going to something concrete. This also targets Hood’s dramatic scene criteria of including a location/setting.
Add some more action. Sad puppies are not convincing enough. Showing mostly volunteers and employees taking care of the animals and giving them nice places to live can be an effective logos move and it targets another Hood tactic, action from characters.
Works Cited
Hood, Dave. “Writing Dramatic Scenes.” Find Your Creative Muse, 11 Oct. 2013, https://davehood59.wordpress.com/2010/03/22/writing-dramatic-scenes/.
Orduña, José. The Weight of Shadows. Beacon Pr., 2016.
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